SCE Reads - Supper Smash Bros: Mishonh From God
by Serene Crimson Electrica
Summary: Watch and laugh as I, Serene Crimson Electrica, read the atrocity that is "Supper Smash Bros: Mishonh From God", and maybe die from brain damage a few times. (I do not own the actual fanfiction or any original characters featured. I only own my commentary.)
1. Chapter 1

**Hey, it's SCE! I just discovered this fanfiction "Supper Smash Bros Mishonh From God", and I was just like "WTF?" when I read the first few lines.**

**I just thought I'd put my own commentary on it, like some other authors have since I just wanted to join in on the fun. Enjoy.**

Hi my name is Sara (not Palin unfortanetly) and im a 13 yearold girl who loves America and God and the Constantution **(…I think I know where this is going already.)** so i librul soshalist who likes barrack obama than LEAVE NAO (**So you're calling yourself a *liberal* and telling yourself to leave?)** and go back too getting wefare for noting and trying to turn every1 into gay athists also I lik video games like supper smash bras **(Supper Smashing Tittiecups. Lol.)** and otters even thou im a gril (my mom sad id turn a les if I play video game but I put pics of jaykob from twilit and juston beber in my room so idont). **(….Dude. Justin Bieber will just make the situation worse.)**

I was in my seance class one dat when my librul **(Did you mean liberal? Is that a grammar error or text language?)** teacher mr jonson was talkin about evilusion. **('Evil'usion. The topic that makes you evil. I might take that class one day.)**

"an tat is why humins came form monkees and their is no god" he said. **(Just a few paragraphs in and I'm already whacking my head off this desk because of the pointless grammar errors.)**

I razed my han.d **(Guys, we have to lift that full stop and throw it over the d and onto the end of the sentence to make it correct. This is going to be hard.)**

"yes Sara" he said.

"if humin came from monkees why r their still monks" **(Did you mean 'monkeys' there? Because I'm not quite sure if this has anything to do with monks.)**

my teacher had no anser for that so he give me a ditention and an f on my test. **(What kind of science teacher do you have? That's not a good reason to penalize a student.)**

"hahaha!" he sad "you Christens wil be defeet on day! **(A science teacher wouldn't waffle on about things like that.)** athests alreedy rule dis cuntry becuz of obama car and son all Christens will goto deaf panells!" **(Obama's Christian, you know.)**

just then the door toteh science room opened and God walked in. **(If that happened it would be front page on the newspaper.)** he was waring a rob and had a bread like he allways does. **(I think you meant beard. Unless he carries bread in case he gets peckish.)**

"mr jonson ur gong too HELL!" **(Apparently gongs play on the elevator to hell.)**

"no cuz u arnt reel" mr jonson said. **(You wouldn't say that unless you haven't fainted from holy shit-ness.)**

"lol ur a moran" **(Not quite sure if God would speak so informally.)** God said and he stroked mr jonson with lighting and mr jonson ded. **(Still banging my head off my desk.)**

"yay!" said all the Christens in the class.

"boo!" said the Heatrans so God stroked all them to. **(God doesn't just kill innocent people like that. THINK OF THE PEOPLE!)**

"ok now I nead too talk too Sara **(insert speech mark here)** God said. "so everbuddy else leave." **(Everbuddy? REALLY?!)**

"ok" my classmates left the room. **(And none of them are in shock of seeing God right up in front of them?)**

"Sara Osborne ive bean watching u for sum time," he sad, **(I'm beginning to sense a Mary-Sue.)** "this world isnt the only on I mad."

"for real" I ask.

"yea do u no about video games." **(Who doesn't?)**

"yea I play them with my bro and Lauren" (my bro is my brother **(I kinda figured.)** and Lauren is my BFF forever and shes a PCC (Pretty Consertative Christen) like me to) (**Nobody cares about your little nicknames.)**

"well they are real because when u play the nother unevirse I made" **(So… you made the Smash Bros. Universe, but you also made worlds like Hyrule? Wow. Unrealistic.)**

"cool God" I hi fived God.** (That's quite a distance you'd have to jump to high-five God. Also, you may just bump into his hand and fall down injured.)**

"ok but theres treble. Satan found out about this and now hes in Nentendo World. Only u **(Apparently, only a 13-year-old girl with no fighting experience can stop Satan. Yep, this is a Mary-Sue we're seeing here.)** can stop him b4 he dose evil stuff their."

"oh no." **("Oh no" is right. Especially when an annoying 13-year-old girl like her is about to go to Smash Mansion.)**

"right this is the hardest thing u ever done even harder than ur math test last month. God thing i'm God and I can give u cool powers and stuff." **(Oh yes, God's just giving a random girl powers and sending her on a very dangerous task. Mary-Sue.)**

So God gave me some power and I fell to sleep. When I woke up I was outside of the Smosh Manshon! **(Ian and Anthony have a mansion? HOW DID I NOT KNOW THIS?!)**

**And that's it. A trollfic all about God and liberals and how gay atheists are "the worst things ever" (no offense). But never mind that, the spelling errors were bad enough for me.**

**(may or may not do commentary on chapter 2~)**


	2. Chapter 2

**I'm surprised I'm still doing commentary on this… so….. enjoy.**

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First of all whats a troll? **(My friend, you are a good example of a troll.)** I men I think I fot sum in a game b4 but there not in my story so why did you mention them in the revew. **(BECAUSE YOU'RE THE BLOODY TROLL!)** And whats a mary sue? **(Your character.)** And my mom and dad sad that I need to spred the truth of God's word on the intranet **(Fanfiction isn't the best place to do that. At least not in the way you do it.)** and speak out aganst the soshalists destroying America.  
Also I didnt updaty yesterday becuz my family thought that their woud be the raptor. **(Do you even know what 'the raptor' is?)** Lauren said their woudnt and she was rite so I gess that provs who smart she is. **(Well, it was kind of obvious there wouldn't, proving that she isn't smart in that way.)**

CHAP 2: SARA MEATS CHARECTERS **(….Ew.)**

the smash mantian was a really big hose **(Now that just sounded wrong.) **with like a gatrillion romos **(What kind of number is that? And what the hell is a romo? Unless you meant room.)** an was alota stories tall I was inteminated by who big it was. **('Alota stories' and 'a gatrillion rooms' is a bit spacious to fit thirty-five smashers and two master/crazy hands into.)** Suddenly someon came. It was like a robot except a person was in it. **(That would be Samus.)**

"hai their pretty gurl" the robot person said. **(Oh dear. Samus being unnecessarily turned into a lesbian.)**

"u think im pretty" I saod. **(You SAO'd. You're trapped in Sword Art Online. Please stay there and don't come back. *sorry couldn't resist*)**

"yea ur the hotist gurl ive ever sean." **(A Mary Sue is always the hottest girl people have ever seen. Also, she's only thirteen, so wouldn't that be pedophilia?)**

I thought it was Mister Chef from Hallo **(You would know it's Samus if you've played SSBB.)** but it wasnt but I didnt no that so I cloded my eyes an mad out with robot person **(How can you make out with the person if s/he's in a robot suit?)** but when I open them its not Mastre Cheef but SAMAS ERIN! **(Again, you didn't know that?)**

"hahahhaha I triked u in too thikning I was a dud but im a girl" samas said. **(She would have figured out by her voice.)**

"why do u do these! I liek guys nit girls ima Christen!" I shooted. **(If she's shooting stuff from her mouth, it's obviously going to be grammar errors, text language and whatnot. Yuck.)**

"BECAUSE IMA LESBAN!" Samas said "anf im a antithesis so I want u 2 goto hell for bein gay like me." **(Samus is being a little OOC.)**

than Samas tred too rap me **(Now that is quite out of place for Samus.)** she took of my shirt (I had my bra under so I wasnt tipless) **(Tipless? Dafuq?)** adn my shirt which had pantees under it so I still wasnt nakid. **(Pantees? Nakid? REALLY?)**

"no help!" I screemed. Lucklily Link and Math and Icke wear nearbye so they git hoarses **(Since when did Marth and Ike have horses?)** and ran up and came b4 iy was to late.

"stop been a gay librul Samas" Icke said. **(Aw shit. Smashers being brought into religious arguments.)**

"yea wereman and your a women so lissen to us" Link said.

"but im a lesban so im a femanast (**Not all lesbians have to be feminists.)** and im not gonna lissen to u" Samas said. She taked of my shoes next. They were fancy hi-hells from goosepy zanaty that cast my mom $2000. **(You wear very expensive shoes as part of your casual outfit?!)** butthan Marth grabed Samas with his hercule arms **(Not quite sure if Marth has 'hercule arms' and not just muscular arms.)** and through her in teh moot off the manshan.

"r u ok" he asked. He kissed my hand romanticly. **(Oh dear, Sara is definitely going to be a Mary-Sue if Link, Marth, Pit, Ike and the like are all in love with her.)**

"yea sorry I mad u do that"

"its ok Samas is a librul so she hadit cumin" March said. I looked into his eyes. **(Incoming shitty romantic scene)** He was like if the looks of Jaykob and Juston Beeber were combined **(That'd make him look like a prick.)** with the genus of Sean Hanety and Ross Limbog. Expect he had blue hare. My hare was long and bland and really petty. **(Petty bland hair. I could imagine that… and not in a good way.)**

"u hat libruls to" I asked.

"yea me and Link and Icke r all borne-agen Christens" Marth said. **(They all believe in different gods/goddesses (Hylia, etc.) They're not Christians.)**

"cool can I meat everyone els" I sad. **(Again, ew. About the whole meating thing.)**

"ok" so I climed on Marth's hoarse and rod too the manshan and went in side. In the manshan I met other Christens like Peach and Zelda **(She believes in Hylia.)** and Ton Link **(As does he.) **and Pit **(He believes in Palutena. He ain't Christian.)** and Nas and Luckas and Kerby and King Deedee and the Maryo bros (Mary and Lugia) **(Luigi got replaced by Lugia? D8)** and Sonec and Sold Snape **(Harry Potter characters in Smash Bros apparently.)**, who was Marth's father (I dont think he was Marths father ibn the gam but wouldnt it be cool if he was) **(They're not even in the same world. Besides, Marth's game was set in a time period ages before Snake's.)** and Clod Strafe and the real Master Chef (those 2 werent in smash bros for some resin but there in this).** (Because they weren't on any Nintendo consoles (at least as far as I know). **But their were also libruls like Bowser and Ganandorf and Waro and Donky Khan and Diddy and Metal Nite and Picachoo **(Picachoo? Really, man? This fic really isn't going to end well.)** and Pacman Tranner **(I always wondered who kept spawning all those Pacmen.)** and the other Pacmans and Wolf and Fux Mcledo and Falcon and Captan Falco (who was Samas boyfrend b4 they both turd gay **(At least check for crude words and unnecessary innuendos.)** from a govermint vaksine). I new I had my work cut out for me. **(Indeed you do. And it's totally pointless, they could have gotten someone better to do it, after all.)**

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**So that was what I actually had time to do. Yup. If I mistakenly offended any Christians out there, my most sincere apologies. I never mean to offend.**

**Again, there may or may not be commentary on the next chapter.**

**Bye for now,**

**~SCE**


	3. Chapter 3

**Sorry I couldn't update quickly, my wifi's been down for quite some time. Anyway, enjoy part three of this commentary where I have died 'like a gatrillion' times now.**

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Stop atecking my storey! **(*pulls out crowbar*)** God will juge u when u dye and if u insult Christens tehn he will send u too Hell! And thanks 2 the people who said nice things. **(Nice things for your trolling skills.)** I no u will goto Haven. **(What kind of place is Haven?)** Also I no that Samas is a lesbain becuas when I firts playted I only saw her in amour soi thought she was a hot guy (**….and apparently what she wears immediately makes her a lesbian?) **but then I usde her finale smash and fond out she was a gurl. I had to star at my pics off justan beber and jayncob 4 even longer then I usuely do wen Lauren comes over 2 kep me strait. **(And as I previously said, Justin Bieber will make it even worse.)**

CHAP 3: HE FINALLE SMASH **(Oh dear. I'm beginning to sense the ultimate depth of Mary-Sue levels.)**

the next day I was in my first mach of my carer. It was Me and Zelda fitting Bowzer and Falcor. We were the rad tem becuase were consercativs and they wear the blu tem becuas they wer libruls. **(Noooo Falco, don't go into the whole religious argument thing!)** I was waerinmg a pretty red dress (**I really don't care about what you were wearing.)** that everone expect the libruls complamented me on. Boozer **(I always wondered who drank all the booze.)** keeped breathing firs at us an Falco shat lazors **(Laser shitting. Sounds disturbing.)** form his gum. Zelda turne dinto Shrek **(Zel's secretly an ogre?) **and throw needs at Boozer and hit hem wiht a chan. Son bowsar was defet. **(Mind still corrupted.)** Ten Falcor git a smash bell and sumoed a gina tank call a lendmaster and shat Zelda **(Yet again pooing on people.)** so she flyed of and loosed. I thout I was domed **(Domed? I think I may know what she might be referring to…)** butthen I herd Gods vois.

"Sara! Remamber the powerz I give u at scool." I used on of the powers that God gav me **(How did you do it?) **and I insanely had my finale smash. **(You didn't have to use a smash ball?)** I actived it and it cussed me to turn into an angle. **(I could imagine that. "TURN INTO A F**KING ANGEL YOU W**KING D**KFACE!" Lol.)** I used my holly powers to stroke down the lendmaster and defete Falco.

"this gams winer: rad tema" the narater said. **(Who's Rad Tema? Was she an assist trophy or something? Oh, what a mystery we have here!)**

When I laft the fit Mart hwas waiting for me. **(Walmart grew legs?)**

"OMG! that was amazon! **(It became a river apparently!) **I nerver seen someone us a finale smash withotu a smash ball b4!" he said.

"Its because of the powers God gave me." (**No, it's because the author probably has a Mary Sue fetish.)**

"Cool. Now me and my dad are fitting Samas and Wario." **(HE IS NOT MARTH'S FATHER! THEY ARE NOT EVEN FROM THE SAME WORLD!)**

Greet! Ill wach" I said.

So tghe next fit began and Marth and Snake are the red team and Samas and Warop were ther blue team. Samas saw I was washing **(Did she bring the car and decide to wash it during the battle.)** so she tred to deduce me with her lucius lips and huge beasts **(Excuse me while I die for a split second.)** but I was strate so it didnt work and Mark hit her with his sord while she was distrected and his dad threw gonads **(He cuts off people's balls and uses them as weapons?!)** at her. She got blowed up and lots a stack.

"Samas! Get ur had in the game! Present brock obana wode want us to kill all Christens," Waryo said. **(As I said previously, Obama's Christian.)**

"Rite" Samas said. She ataked Marth and Snake. **(You could at least describe how she attacked, like kicks, laser things, etc.?)**

Son everybuddy only had on stack left. Wart rain tords Snack and het him with a motosicle. **(For some reason I'm sensing the vocabulary being a little worse than usual here.) **He flowed off and explode.

"Father! NO!" Matt said. **(Oh. Snake is actually the father of some guy named Matt.)** He ran at Waryo with is sore.

"Ate hem!" Samasa sad.

"I cant im a librul vogon now so ican only eat vegetas." Waryo said. **(I don't know much about Dragon Ball, but it doesn't sound like a good idea to eat Vegeta.)** So Waryo was lose. It was a on-and-on fit betwine Samas and Marth.

"give it up Samas u no libruls cant won." **(Aaaaand still on with unnecessary religious arguments.)**

"never! BY THE POWAR OF LORD SANTA I SHALL BANESH U TOO SUBSPAS WORLD!" **(Santa's here?, Well, merry Subspace-Christmas, bitches.)**

then a porthole openend an sucked. **(Yes, apparently portholes suck. Bawlz.)** Math into subspas. The fite was over. The libruls had won.

"wat did u do 2 my sun!" Snake said **(Well, Snake, we are in orbit around the sun.) **wen the match was over and marth didnt come back.

"Ill never tell!" Samas said. She blowed me a kiss (witch I dogged) **(How do you dodge a kiss you can't even see?)** and waked away.

I was worred when Marth didnt come back. He still wasnt back for the tee party relay so I went with Clod Strafe insted. **(Oh, don't tell me Sara's going to be a cheating bastard.)** When I went to sleeped at nite I preyed for marth. Then I lacked the widows **(Lacking widows. What the freak?)** and doors so Samas couldnt rap me wile I sleeped.

That nite I had horble nitmars that Math was farced too have gay sax with Satin and Bark Obameh. It was the scurrest thin ever! **(Hmm… that does sound pretty scary. Coming from a yaoi fan who's seen Bible fanfictions.)**

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**And that concludes part three. My death rate has been increased now to 1.5 gatril- wait whaaaa-**

**~SCE**


	4. Chapter 4

Mary CHRISmes Eev everbuddy! **(Why so many everbuddys?)** I hop the pepole who sad gopd thins abot my storey get what they want and the pepool **(Pepool? OKAY GUYS WHO PEED IN THE POOL.)** who said bed thins donut. **(A donut sounds good.)** Hopfully ican finish anutter chaptar 2morow **(What's a nutter chapter?)** but its CRISmos (NOT HAPY HOLDAYS LIBRULS) and I hav stuf with my famaly and then ill spend the knight at Laurens hose **(She claims to be straight and yet she just made a lesbian innuendo.)** were well chang in2 are new close 4 each otter (I cant wate. Im shur shell be riley pritty).

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CHAP 4: THE SERCH 4 MATRH **(And so commences another adventure of bad grammar.)**

the next day all off the Christens in the Manshon were locking for maerth. **(And my hypothesis is that the next day, stuff happened.)** He was still not back from were Samas put him. I preyed and preyed that we woud found him but he was nowere near the manshon. **(If God can give you powers and communicate with you during battles, why doesn't he tell you where Marth is? Heh, logic.)** I new I had to confont Samas about were Marth was but I new she woud try 2 rap me agen if I came along so I bringed Clod and Sonec and Maryo with me. Samas wasin bad with 4 womens **(Okay, Sam's being so out of character that it's just ridiculous.)** and they were kissing and dong it to each otter. **(And when you say 'dong' you're referring to… oh crap O_O)**

"discussing!" Maryo vomated. **(What were they discussing? How to dong it to each otter? And what does it mean to 'vomat'?) **

"stop it Samas!" Sonec said.

"girls sholdnt do that 2 otter girls!" Clod said. **(Oh Cloud. Now you're in the whole anti-lesbo thing. It's their choice whether they want to be lesbian or not.)**

"Sara! U must jonus and be gay!" Samas and the otter lesbamns said.

"No! Im ten trillian percant strait!" I shatted. **(She seems to be skilled in the art of shitting.)**

"ok then well gagrap u into been gay!" Samas and the other lesbans got outta bad. Clod pulled out his gina sore **(ATTACK OF THE GINA SORE!)** and smucked a lesban with it. She flyed out the widow. Then Maryo shat furballs at anotter lesban and she burst into fame. **(FURBALL SHIT MAKES PEOPLE FAMOUS!)** They Sonce rolled into a bill to defete another one and I used my unbettable marital arts on the other one. **(And you had no previous experience with martial arts before?)** Samas was bye herself.

"tellus were Marth is!" I smacked her.

"No!" Samas said. I started stroking her with lighting from my fingers like in Stair Was becuz one of the powers God gave me was tobe a yeti with the forc. **(If you were a yeti you would be shooting snow.)**

"Tell us now!"

"NECAR!" Samas said. **(BEHOLD THE ALMIGHTY POWER OF… UH… WHATEVER NECAR IS!)**

"Stop Sara ur 2 powerful **(Yeah. What a Mary Sue she is.)** if u keep atecking Samas shell die and than well never fond math!" Sonec said. I new he had a pint **(He's drunk?!)** so I stapped using lighting on Samas. We had 2 find someone eels **(Oh no… not the eels! Anything but the eels!)** who could find Marth. I preyed that God wood show me were Mart was.

"Sara! Mark is in Subspas!" I herd God say. **(He didn't say that before?!)**

"Thanks God!" I sad back.

"Were is Marth" Maryo said. **(And the characters get themselves involved.)**

"Hes in Subspas!" I said.

"Oh no how did u no!" Samas sad. Clod hit her with his sord to knack her unconshus. **(Yeah, Cloud. Give her a good sord-knacking.)**

"Not Subspas that place is terryfine!" Clod said. **(Incoming out of character Cloud.)**

"But we havto Marth is in treble!" I said.

"Well ned more people Snoop will want 2 cum **(That sounds sexual. Also, who the hell is Snoop?)** too save his son and Lonk and Ick are Marth's beast pals. **(Beast pal. Makes sense at least for Link.)** Zolta an Pech shuld came to and also Kerby and my bro Luweegee **(Wait… you said 'weegee' in that. I hope he sucks out Sara's soul and kills her.)** and Pete cuz hes an angle" **(What type of angle is Pete? Wait, I know nothing of maths. '-';)** Maro said. So we get everbuddy adn goto Subspas to fine Marth.

In Subspas were insanely atecked by Subspas stuff but we beet them. Then we find Master Han and Crazy Hanes. **(I'm still wondering how you 'insanely' make these grammar errors.)**

"Whatter u dong her" Mister Hans said.

"Weve cum 2 find Marth" I said.

"No Sara u will dye!" Crazy Ham said. He tred to pinch me but I puled out my dads shitgun **(Wow. That's a weird thing to shoot from a gun.) **(its one of my specal movs no that im a smasher) and shat him until he ded. Than I did the sam to Master Hemp.

"Well dun but Marth is still mine" Tatu leder of Subspas came. **(ALL THE THINGS SHE SAID ALL THE THINGS SHE SAID RUNNING THROUGH MY- wait, Sara wouldn't like Tatu for that song.)**

"ILL KILL U!" I said. I tred too shat him but he took my gum away b4 I cold. **(Noooo, my gum!)**

"Ha! U shuld no im a librul so I allways take teh gins away!" He said. I was rite I shuld have nown that. I tred my lighting buthe bloked it. Tehn I tred all my otter atecks. **(Just how many attacks does she have?)**

"who r u dong this" I aked "my powers cum form GOD!" **(If she keeps saying 'dong' she'll sound pervy.)**

"yes wile mine come from Satin." **(Because satin is most powerful material.)**

"Bit Santana is weeker then God!"

"Yes but im alos the antichris!" **(An antichrist versus an antihero. DIS GON BE GOOD.)**

"how r u relly" I said. **(He's relly because he's relly.)**

So Taboo roped of his musk and reveled that he was a bleck guy. But he was wering a soot not gane close so I new he culd only be presadent brock obama! **(I'm starting to get the idea that this is purposely a crackfic. Wait, it's probably half-crackfic, half-trollfic.)**

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**And so concludes another chapter of the commentary on this masterpiece. I… really don't know what to say about it.**

**Well, see you guys later, when I've actually regained my sanity.**

**~SCE**


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